West End Doula

Thoughts from the heart and mind of a new doula.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Disappointment

I've turned down the birth with the Afghani woman, much to my dismay. Every time I thought about it, I had a panic attack. I think someone with more experience is needed in her situation, so it went back to my referral coordinator for her to resolve.

I feel terrible.

I probably could have done the birth, right? I could have. But I would have been nervous and/or terrified the whole time, if my current state is to be taken as any indication.

My coordinator said it was fine, that these situations happen, and it would be resolved. I still feel like a world class ass for taking the birth in the first place.

13 Comments:

  • At 1:11 PM, Blogger The Teacher said…

    I think that you made a good choice. If you were with the mother and weren't confident she'd be able to sense that. Knowing your limits (for the time being) is really important. If this had come up after you'd had a bit more experience under your belt, it would have been easier.

     
  • At 11:44 PM, Blogger dearheart said…

    I agree with Karin. Please don't beat yourself up over this. Although this is an exciting time for you, it is a new experience and with that usually comes some discomfort and trepidation.

     
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